Workaholics

Since I've been back from school, I've been working at a tanning salon. Yes, another diva move. But, this isn't just any normal salon. No, it's my sister-in-laws business. Every family member, every friend of mine, and even every friend of a friend has worked or currently works here. You can say that we're your typical every day Italian family. But, please don't compare us to "Real Housewives of New Jersey," they just give our nationality a bad name.
Anyways, I've been back and forth from school working here since it opened 3 years ago, and the one thing that gets me excited when I go home is Bronze Tanning. I love working here. Weird, I know..No one likes to work, every one dreads work, and people wish they could never work a day in their life if they could. But, Bronze is different. I love socializing with different people, it's so entertaining. The things people say are out of this world, especially when they look at our magazines and critque every single celebrity they see. Or even when they ask about the tanning beds, "So these UV beds get you tan?" This line is my favorite that clients say. Like no, they bleach your skin actually, OBVIOUSLY they get you tan. What do you think the words bronze TANNING is? Do you think our company name is lying to you? NO! Aside from the dumb ones that come in, we actually get a variety of other different people: cool moms, bitchy teens, hot dudes my age, women who can't speak English, old men, friends, and of course the rich rude ladies. God, do I hate the rich rude ladies. THEY ARE SO MEAN! They come in here with a stick up their ass acting like they deserve a tiara for being so fake. I mean, fake boobs, fake lips, fake hair(that my sister probably does), FAKE EVERYTHING. But, they come in and act like they have unlimited tanning.
Me- So, it looks like you're out of tans, would you like to buy a walk-in or a package today?
Rich rude lady-What? I'm out of tans? Are you serious?
Me-Yes
Rich rude lady-(rude tone)Um, I have only tanned here a couple of times, there's definitely a mistake.
Me-(tells her what day she's tanned on and how many tans she's bought..lady has it wrong)
Rich rude lady- Whatever, I'll just buy new tans, I guess (eyes rolling like a tumble weed in the wild wild west)
   No eye contact just looking at her phone with her eyebrows high as the sky looking like she's too surprised for words...or maybe it was just her botox making her look like that. Who knows.

Another scenario
 Me-Hi how are you today?
 Rich rude lady-good, can i go into the Matrix?
 Me-We are actually booked for another hour, would you like to make an appt?
 Rich rude lady- Every time I come in here, you guys are always booked. (Walks out the door)

...cool

My favorite is when the rich rude ladies get a spray tan.

In the spray tanning booth, there's a poster to instruct clients what positions to do during the session. Not only do I show them the poster (that they can see during the tan session), but I reenact the movements and inform them about every little detail. The spray booth also talks to the clients telling them what position to be in next. It's ridiculous how easy it is. Plus, I tell them how they aren't supposed to shower within 4-6 hours and how you are not supposed to sweat nor go to the gym because you'll streak. Every normal lady knows this, come on.
Anyways, when the new rich rude client comes back from a spray tan, she'll complain about how it didn't give her enough time to switch positions and how she demands her money back. Annoying, right?
Or 4 hours later, I'll get a phone call saying:

 Rich rude lady-"I streaked, it looks terrible..blah blah blah".
 My response- "did you sweat?"
 Rich rude lady- "No, but I'm going throught menopause and I'm having an episode of hot flashes.  This isn't my fault, I want my money back."
 A response I wished to say- "HAHAHAHAH! SUCKS DUMB ASS"

No, no, no... i would never say that.. ;)

One rich rude lady actually came in, sprayed and then yelped about us 2 hours later (thankfully this is the only bad review out 25 of them that we've gotten)

I went to the spray booth....bad idea, by the time you read the next "pose" outside the door, you've missed the spraying...wait till they have the person who will spray you to have this done, don't use the booth, STREAKING ALL OVER THE PLACE....get the lotion at Walgreens, better idea.

...whatever lady, you're dumb

But, 1 out 80 of our clientale are the rich rude ladies and we have about 3,500 clients.

All the others are so friendly and nice..These clients are the reason why I love working here!